Would you date the Bachelor?

Love. People have a natural biological and psychological desire to feel acceptance and community through love. That’s why, even with so much independence to this day, people are still dating. 

Oh, dating. 

I was having a conversation with a friend the other day who loves the show the Bachelor. They were filling me in on all the details (which were juicy), but ended the conversation with a hypothetical, "Would you date the Bachelor?"

Anyone that knows me well could probably agree that I am a decently laid back person. I am very go with the flow and see where life takes me. I am open to learning new things and new ideas, but I have my few things I have strong opinions that I won't wavier on.

As a business owner of a growing company, finding time to switch gears from a packed schedule to slowing down and enjoying the moment with my partner is difficult. Personally, I do not like dating. I have never liked it. It takes so much to get me out on a date because I am not attracted to a lot of people enough to form a relationship. 

Over the course of my life I have learned so much more about my values and how much loyalty, trust, monogamy and partnership mean to me. They are at the tip-top of my list and have only grown stronger as my success has grown. When you can provide a lot for yourself, it puts you in a very empowering position to be with a partner who treats you right. As a female entrepreneur, you have to date men that are extremely secure with themselves to cheer for your successes even when they are bigger than his and that is a very rare find. It takes a very strong man, so you have to be picky.

So many people are dating these days as online dating has become more accessible and TV views are off the charts with dating shows like the Bachelor / Bachelorette. The ample accessibility has created this mindset of disposability. 

Here’s my unpopular opinion:

I do not understand the Bachelor OR Bachelorette. Is it normal for people to be dating 20 people at one time and then picking the best one? What’s up with this “numbers game” concept? There is nothing romantic about that and I would hope that people in real life see their worth to not deal with being an option like that. I would never want to be treated that way and I would not want to have partner that would accept that behavior either.

What is romantic is someone liking you and being curious about you enough to give an honest effort to see if you're compatible. If it doesn’t work? Then that person is secure enough in who they are that they won’t crumble from rejection and not have to rely on “backup plans” to lessen the blow.

“Rather than fostering relationships in which each partner is seen as equally desirable and valuable, the show frames the titular bachelor as the ultimate prize and makes it necessary for the contestants to "prove their worth" to him/her.” I am no expert, but that does not seem like a great way to lay a foundation for a fulfilling partnership. 

In an already diluted culture of love, I don’t think this show teaches good values to the masses and misconceptions can spread easily. Although we may know it’s a show for entertainment, others younger could grow up with some seriously misleading understandings of dating and relationships and… that is our social responsibility to identify. Kind of a ramble, I know.

So what do we do about it? Wish I knew! But talking about it could create a spark. 

What I do know… you the prize, baby. Never settle for less. 

So, no. I would not date the Bachelor. I would give him his rose back and go get a snack.